Let us introduce you to Robert Brault. He is a free-lance writer who has contributed to magazines and newspapers in the USA for over 40 years. He offers his writings as entertainment only, promoting no agenda and no personal philosophy, but hopes you take amusement or inspiration from his words. We really enjoy his slant on life, love and laughter. Visit Robert Brault and his Blog at: www.robertbrault.com
Quotations and observations by Robert Brault -- Photo by Leon Spencer
"The more side roads you stop to explore, the less likely that life will pass you by."
"To find someone who will love you for no reason, and to shower that person with reasons, that is the ultimate happiness."
"Show up, work hard, learn from your mistakes, catch a break now and then, and, looking back, it will all seem like a strategy."
"How often we choose to continue the life we know, only to look back and realize that it was not one of the choices."
"To be an optimist in this topsy-turvy world, you have to believe in Yhprum's Law."**
"Conspicuously absent from the Ten Commandments is any obligation of parent to child. We must suppose that God felt it unnecessary to command by law what He had ensured by love."
"If you are not a figure of authority to your kids, then you should at least pray to God that they find one."
"A child wants more to feel secure in your judgment than to know the reason for everything you ask."
"The average American family raises 2.3 children, although some raise one child with a 2.3 degree of difficulty."
"There is no more distraught an outcast than a teenage girl who has been grounded when all her friends have been disowned."
"Though, Lord knows, you try, you never quite succeed in jumping off your family tree."
"A family tree is a search party that has been fanning out for centuries to find you, just in case you think they're about to let you go."
"Nothing shakes your faith in democracy like the family's three-to-two vote for fudge sundaes for breakfast."
"What you discover in a democracy is that it is difficult to build a house when each nail has an opinion."
"Both the optimist and the pessimist plan for the worst-case scenario, but the optimist doesn't depend on it."
You wonder how many times the Creator has looked down on the human circus and said, , "You couldn't think this up."
"Know thyself, or at least keep renewing the acquaintance."
"I've concluded, after many years, that my mind works by process of elimination, although, as yet, it hasn't actually eliminated anything."
"What makes child-raising difficult is that each day you have to start with the child you have raised so far."
"You wonder if the nuclear holocaust that destroys one world is the Big Bang that starts the next."
"One thing you find when you consent to being a doormat -- they want you to say WELCOME."
"As a way to get to know new people, try giving a little more attention to the people you know."
"I have this theory: maybe, over millions of years, buried bones get larger by absorbing calcium from the earth's crust. Nah, dinosaurs make more sense."
"If you will recognize the blessings in your life, your intellect will soon enough come to accept their source."
"In the soul of every gardener is a vestige of belief in the Tooth Fairy."
"What is a gardener, after all, but a magician's assistant.
"If you've never experienced the joy of accomplishing more than you can imagine, plant a garden."
"One might define God as whoever it is who knew exactly the kids you would have picked out for yourself."
"You can awaken each day to obligations you never chose -- or you can decide now to choose them."
"Never hold a grudge, especially one whose year of origin can only be determined by radioactive dating."
While others are laid to their rest, an American is buried with a list of "Things I Gotta Do in the Six Weeks the Fingernails Keep Growing."
Talk about a persuasive tongue -- you know those TV ads where they say "Strict limit of three to a caller?" Well, I talked the guy into selling me four.
"At some point in childhood you discover that nothing is fun forever, which news you then have to break to your dog."
"What every manipulator of crowds knows is that no two people are alike; it takes three or more."
In one compartment of my mind reside my thoughts and in the compartment below reside my beliefs, and my beliefs keep pounding on the ceiling, shouting, "Be quiet up there!"
"If you haven't time to respond to a tug at your pants leg, your schedule is too crowded."
"Somewhere in the cold of the first winter, there was an optimist imagining the first spring."
"Hope is what you get if you apply logical inference to the existence of flowers."
"The experience I gained at age 21 would be useful if I were ever 21 again. But I'm 71and new at it and keep making age 71 mistakes."
"Courage: Perseverance against odds. Defined in war as bravery. Defined in parenting as parenting."
"The trick is to convince your kids that schooling can help them in life and is not just, you know, for educational purposes."
Kid to kid: "I don't get my mom -- she expects me to know why I want to do something before I even do it."
Darwin called the sudden appearance of flowers in the fossil record an "abominable mystery." You wonder, if there were proof in the fossil record of God saying, "Let there be flowers," what do you suppose Darwin would have called it?
"Perhaps God gives us a physical body so that every time we change our mind, we won't be someone else."
"Here is the basic question: Are we marionettes, or are we creatures of free will who just happen to have a lot of jerky reflexes?"
"What is a human being but a marionette pulling his own strings -- while trying to do watercolor and needlepoint."
"There is evidence of progress. Soldiers still die in battle, but horses are no longer shot out from under them. "
"It's a nasty divorce when they can't agree on how to divvy up the His and Hers towels."
"It's not over until it's over, but then it is."
"If you aren't honor-bound to do anything else, you aren't honor-bound to get even, either."
"A river does not beat its head against obstacles. It always goes around -- and it always gets to the sea."
"I decided long ago that if I miss something important in life, it won't be because I hurried past it."
"If I were Opportunity, I wouldn't just knock, you'd have to sign."
"When you have tried all your life to solve a mystery, and never solved it, you might consider the possibility that it is not a mystery."
"World-weary, I look out my window and watch my child find a dozen fascinating detours from the school bus to the front door."
"You have a choice: you can raise kids, or you can live in a home where nothing touches the floor but the furniture."
"My metaphor for loneliness? I'm standing alone on a station platform, having missed the last train to eternity."
"Might as well face it, they can skimp on material faster than you can lose weight."
Ever since seeing "GoodFellas" I have this nightmare where it's Judgment Day and the first words out of God's mouth are, "I amuse you? I make you laugh?"
"Is there a heaven? I don't know, but I know that life ends with something that takes your breath away."
"You don't want to get to the end of life's journey and discover you never left the interstate."
"The universe was born in mystery and will die, I suspect, when the mystery is solved."
"In the end it's all about what you get done while you're wondering if there's any use in doing it."
"Frugality would be an estimable virtue if it were ever voluntary."
"He was a blogger, which is to say, he died known only to strangers."
An obit idea I bequeath to anyone who wishes to use it:
"She leaves her husband... three children... a brother... a sister... six grandchildren, several nephews and nieces, and many strangers who would have loved to know her."
(Dedicated to a dear departed blog friend, Liz Armbruster)
"In what you say of another, apply the test of kindness, necessity and truth, and let
nothing pass your lips without a 2/3 majority."
If what you say is not necessary, be sure it is kind and true.
If what you say is not kind, be sure it is true and necessary.
If what you say is not true, be sure it is necessary and kind.
-- Liz Armbruster & Robert Brault
** Yhprum's Law is the opposite of Murphy's Law (Yhprum = Murphy backwards). The simple formula of Yhprum's Law is: "Everything, that can work, will work." Due to Richard Zeckhauser, a professor for political economy at Harvard University: "Sometimes systems that should not work, work nevertheless."